I’m about to write something that demands attention, I hope.
We all talk about having 2 individuals within us, a lover and a fighter.
For most, one outweighs the other but that doesn’t mean it’s not in us. Loyalty and love shouldn’t be weaved in with tenacity and clinginess. I love you, I want to see you, I want to know how you are or even how your day has been, I’ll be there on your beck and call BUT, and here’s the thing where most get it incredibly wrong.
I am completely, mentally, physically and emotionally aware that I am my own person and so are you. We are two separate beings and never will I glue your entire life to mine.
Majority of us, especially British humans, have a tendency of having trouble with the word ‘no’, be it with their worldly matters or a personal war, but as a nation we are pretty shit at saying ‘no’ to people. I’ve always had trouble saying ‘no’ but you will NEVER find me competing for your affection. I refuse to waste my time on people who are not connected with their hearts, who think mind games somehow make them mysterious and people who just take and don’t give. It’s a balance right? This taking and giving system we have? Work on it.
It’s taken me years to develop the confidence to work on my self-doubt so if insecurities do knock on my doors, I will NOT ask you to fix it. I will work on it myself because these tides are an old friend.
I hope you read this carefully and believe that the more love I spread in this world, the same self defence I have for myself. I’ve been in this world long enough to understand that no matter what, you are responsible for your heart and choose who gets to hurt it.
I am a lover, I am also a fighter.